Bonnie Meeder and Valarie Remmers knew each other for many years as members of King of Glory Lutheran Church, Dallas. They would see each other at church events and Sunday services, but they weren’t what you’d call close friends. That changed last year when a medical event brought them together for a lifelong and life-giving bond.
Meeder had been living with chronic kidney disease for six years. When she went in for a checkup last May, she learned that her disease had progressed to stage 4. Her doctors told her it was time to consider a transplant or dialysis.
Meeder’s nephrologist suggested finding a living kidney donor because her health was otherwise good and the life expectancy would be about twice as long compared to a cadaver donation. “The search for a living donor was our family’s responsibility, and it became an all-consuming project,” she said.
Her husband, Bill, and their two adult sons quickly registered as potential donors. Meeder wasn’t surprised at this, but she was taken aback when her sister-in-law and her son’s fiancee decided to register too. “Both of them are incredibly generous people, but being generous with everyday things is different from offering to undergo surgery to donate a functioning kidney,” she said.
After a few months, Meeder and her family learned that none of them were a match. “With each rejection, the news became much more disheartening,” Meeder said. “I wasn’t the only one affected, as each family member was disappointed they couldn’t be the antidote to my deteriorating condition.”
By September the Meeders had to expand their donor search, something Bonnie, a private person, was hesitant to do. They first turned to their church. After talking with their pastor, Jon Bustard, they sent a notice out to the congregation, explaining the situation and asking people to consider registering as potential donors.
When Remmers saw the notice, she immediately registered. After learning she was a match with Meeder, she underwent extensive screening that ensured she was a qualified donor. “I was excited I could do this for Bonnie,” Remmers said.
The Meeders had their prayer answered. “It gave new meaning to being a ‘community Lutheran church,’ our church’s tagline,” Meeder said. “Although Valarie and I were not related by blood or marriage, I came to realize there was another bond there, equally strong, and that was our church family.”
The Sunday before the surgery, a prayer service was held between worship services at King of Glory. About 200 people came to lay hands on Meeder and Remmers and offer prayers.
On Dec. 17 the two underwent successful transplant surgery. Some church members sat with the women’s families at the hospital during the surgeries and several visited them afterward.
“It was overwhelming how supportive our friends and family were during this process,” Remmers said.
Today both women are feeling great. When Meeder’s post-surgery visitor restrictions were lifted, the two spent their first one-on-one time together getting to know each other better. “There is a forever bond between us,” Remmers said. “This made me realize that when I pay attention to God’s call, fabulous things can happen.”
Meeder said she feels gratified by Remmers’ faithful trust: “I believe her life-giving gift is an inspiration not only to us, but to others who learn our story.”
